When all you have is memories of your family it is hard. The memories of Haiti keep us going every day and we just keep tyring to think positively that Z will be home sooner than later. It still is not easy. I keep looking at the pictures over and over and keep watching the video over and over but it dose not fill the hole in my heart the constant worry that i feel every day. I know...i know this sounds so negative and i need to keep my mind in the positive and i try really hard but when you get news that sets you back it just mentally overwhelming. This is one if my times when I am going to say adoption is hard and I know in the end it will be all worth it.
I just read all these blogs and it seems that we all go through our time when it becomes hard. (and i am not speaking for everyone. just an observation) The holidays are coming and all i can think about is one more Christmas with out her one more tree to put up with out her help. I guess i could go on and on but i won't i am just feeling sorry for myself.
I am going to start being grateful for the thing i have (like a wise women i know Michelle) So i am grateful that I am adopting a wonderful, funny ,loving child for Haiti and that before i know it will be here and i will not even have time to blog.
I just read all these blogs and it seems that we all go through our time when it becomes hard. (and i am not speaking for everyone. just an observation) The holidays are coming and all i can think about is one more Christmas with out her one more tree to put up with out her help. I guess i could go on and on but i won't i am just feeling sorry for myself.
I am going to start being grateful for the thing i have (like a wise women i know Michelle) So i am grateful that I am adopting a wonderful, funny ,loving child for Haiti and that before i know it will be here and i will not even have time to blog.
4 comments:
That is my wish too! Ronnie you have come a long way since last January when I first met you. Back then you "acted" like you were doing this because Ryan really wanted to, you were never going to go back to Haiti, and once she was home you were never going to look back. Now maybe I am just making assumptions and maybe I have this all wrong but I see a huge change in you for the better. Sometimes going through hard times makes us better people and not that you needed improving you are one of the funniest, and nicest(in your sarcastic way) person I know, but you will be changed by this experience, at least I know I have been changed! Hang in there, Z will be home soon!
I am not great at telling people my feelings it is the hardest thing that i could ever do, so i tend to put my feeling in to sarcasim or i come across as not really caring at all. Through this journey I have learned alot of things and i have opened up a little more with my adoption feelings.. I have always been head over heal in love wiht Z no matter how i might have come across but as far as for Haiti i still have a hard time with going there it makes me so sad that i can not help everyone that lives there and adopt everyone:)
You are such a sweetheart R! I'm praying for the same things! It's true each day is difficult, some seem almost impossible, but a precious memory or their sweet smiles helps so much. Our babies are just so darn amazing, aren't they? There so worth it and we love them so much! I pray that sweet little Z will be home with you and R her loving family as soon as possible. It will happen soon. ;) Great big Hug!
I use sarcasm a lot as well, I knew you loved Z the moment you set eyes on her at the O!
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